8/4/86
written by
Bob Flicker
"ROBOT WORKERS" is one of the lead stories listed on the cover of TIME Magazine for the week of September 9, 2013. The story talks about robots replacing workers. One of those robots is listed as a welding robot.
I wrote about welding robots replacing HANK SPUTOWSKI in three different assembly line jobs in my story THE REPLACEMENT 27 years ago. In real life there are no surprise endings to the TIME story, there is in my story, THE REPLACEMENT.
Take a look:
(picture from TIME Magazine, September 9, 2013 edition)
THE REPLACEMENT
written by Bob Flicker 8/4/86
cast
HANK SPUTOWSKI...age 35
CORY SPUTOWSKI...age 25
MS. BLANK.................mid 30’s
SCENE I
The living room of HANK and CORY SPUTOWSKI. The furniture is worn and drab. Children’s toys, magazines, and articles of clothing are strewn about. The room is a statement of poverty and neglect.
HANK lays, sprawled on the sofa. He is unshaven and wears a sweat-stained undershirt that is only partially tucked into dirty, unwashed jeans. He wears no shoes. His socks have large holes through which his toes protrude. despite the time of day (10:00 a.m.) he is drinking from a quart bottle of beer. HANK is 35 years old and is an unemployed, journeyman welder. He has been out of work for more than one year. After trying, fruitlessly, to find new employment, he has stopped looking.
CORY is HANK’S wife of ten years. She is only 25 years old but looks years older. Four children, endless housework and a night-time job as a waitress at a diner has worn her out. Her marriage to HANK was forced upon her and a reluctant HANK after he got her pregnant when she was 15 years old.
CORY stands over HANK. She wears a bandana on her head. A broom is in one hand and a dustpan in the other.
CORY (SCREAMING) Get up you bastard! It’s ten in the morning! Why ain’t you out
look'n for work?
HANK Don’t scream at me Cory! You know damn well why I’m not look’n. There
ain’t noth’n out there for an experienced welder like me. Nobody’s hire’n.
They’re all lay’n off. You know I’ve looked and looked.
CORY You can take some other kinda work.
HANK Like what?
CORY I don’t care what! Anything so long as it can bring in some money. (SHE
BURSTS INTO TEARS) Hank, the bank’s gonna take our house! We ain’t
paid the mortgage for the past five months!
HANK (SITTING UP) What does the bank want with a dump like this?
C’mon Cory stop cry’n. We’ll think of someth’n. (HE RISES TO HIS FEET,
REACHING OUT TO COMFORT CORY. SHE PULLS AWAY AT HIS TOUCH.)
We still got your money com’nin.
CORY (WIPING AWAY THE TEARS WITH HER HANDS) Are you kid’n? Wait’n on
tables at the diner ain’t gonna save our house! The salary and tips I get
barely puts food on the table. (SHE TURNS TO WALK AWAY AND THEN
WHEELS AROUND TO CONFRONT HANK.) I don't know how much longer
I can keep go'n like this! Take'n care of 4 kids and the house dur'n the day and
work'n at night. Look at me! I'm 25 and look like 45!
HANK (REACHES OUT TO CORY) You don’t look so bad. C’mere. Gimme a
kiss.
CORY (PUSHING HIM AWAY) Keep away from me you-- you animal!
HANK Animal?
CORY Yeah! Animal! all you ever think about is grab’n at me and screw'n!
HANK (HIS MALE EGO IS INJURED) You never use’ta complain! Let me tell you
someth’n—I don’t need you to go to bed with me! There are others who
can’t wait!
CORY I know about those others! Those ugly, fat whores who hang out at the bar.
You think I don’t know what you do after I go to work?
HANK What do you know? You don’t know noth’n!
CORY (SHE IS FILLED WITH ANGER AND LOATHING.) I know plenty! I know
when you’re supposed to be home watch’n the kids after I go to work, you
take off for Hoolihan’s Bar and—
HANK So what’s wrong if I have a few drinks with the boys? Jimmy’s old enough
to baby sit.
CORY (SCREAMING) Old enough! You never cared about Jimmy! You blame him
for you have’n to marry me!
HANK (WEAKLY) That’s not true Cory.
CORY You knocked me up when I was fifteen Hank! If you hadn’ta
married me you woulda gone to jail!
HANK (PROTESTING WEAKLY) I married ya because I love ya.
COREY Ya loved me? Ha! That’s a hot one! You were 25 and I was a dumb,
overdeveloped teenager with hot pants. You were screw’n a dozen other
high school girls. Some of em younger’n me. I was unlucky enough to get
pregnant.
HANK That don’t mean I don’t love ya. I love Jimmy—all our kids.
CORY If ya love Jimmy why do you leave him alone at night?
HANK He’s a big kid, that’s why.
CORY Jimmy is ten years old! What’s he gonna do if the house catches on fire?
HANK The house ain’t gonna catch on fire. Who tole you about me leav’n the
house and go’n to Hoolihan’s?
CORY Never ya mind who told me. I know all about your have’n a few drinks with
the (PAUSES FOR EMPHASIS) boys. Some boys! Shiftless bums more like it! I
also know you been bang’n anyth’n wear’n a skirt or—other wise.
HANK Whada ya mean—or otherwise? Don’t you start gett’n any ideas I’m queer
or someth’n! O.K., I admit there’s been a few times when I crawled into the
sack with some bimbo. What’s the big deal? We ain’t done noth’n for
months. A man’s entitled!
CORY (BITTER) Entitled?
HANK Yeah! Entitled! Look, I’m a healthy 35-year-old man. I got needs!
CORY (RISING ANGER) Needs? You got needs? So do I got needs! And So do our
four kids got needs! D’ya wanna know about our needs? (DOESN’T WAIT
FOR A RESPONSE) We need security! We need to know that our home ain’t
gonna be taken away! We need a little fun in our lives! Hank, we need an
awful lot and we ain’t gett’n noth’n!
HANK (DEFENSIVE) It ain’t my fault I got laid off! Ya act like I didn’t knock myself
out look’n for work. Ya know damn well I did! I trained for year to become
an expert welder. I’m the best Cory!There ain’t nobody better’n me! I
figured I was set for life on the assembly line. (FURY) Three times! Three
fuck’n timesI got good jobs and three fuck’n times I got laid off!
CORY I heard that story a hundred times. I don’t wanna hear it no more! There’s
other work to be found!
HANK What? Like digg’n ditches?
CORY If that what it takes to support your family. Yeah! What’s wrong with digg’n
ditches if it keeps a roof over our heads?
HANK I’m a craftsman! A trained welder! Not no godamned ditch digger!
CORY Hank, right now you ain’t noth’n but an outa work slob who’s
used up his unemployment and union benefits! You’re a noth’n!
(SCREAMING) Ya hear me? A noth’n!
HANK (HIS MANHOOD IN SHREDS) I’m still a man Cory and don’t ya forget it!
Ask any of those bimbos down at Hoolihan’s what kinda man I am. They’ll
tell ya!
CORY What are they gonna tell me, that ya got a big welding rod! Big deal! Any
gorilla in the zoo can claim the same thing. Ya wanna prove you’re a man?
Get a job! Any kinda job—includ’n digg’n ditches!
THE DOORBELL RINGS TWICE
HANK Must be the mailman.
CORY Yeah, with more bills we can’t pay!
HANK Ya wanna get the mail?
CORY What for?
HANK GOES FOR THE MAIL AND RETURNS WITH A HALF DOZEN ENVELOPES THAT HE IS FANNING THROUGH.
HANK Bill—bill—bill—hey, what’s this? (HE PULLS OUT AN ENVELOPE FROM
THE MIDDLE OF THE STACK.) Ain’t no return address or name on this here
envelope. (HE HOLDS THE ENVELOPE UP TO THE LIGHT TRYING TO
DETERMINE ITS CONTENTS.) I wonder who it's from?
CORY You can bet it’s somebody we owe money too.
HANK Well, there’s only one way to find out. (HE TEARS THE ENVELOPE OPEN
AND REMOVES A BUSINESS LETTER AND SOME FORMS.) It’s from the
TECHNOLOGY REORIENTATION EMPLOYMENT AGENCY. I’ve been to
every employment agency around. Ain’t never heard of them.
CORY What do they want?
HANK (READING ALOUD) It says here: “Dear Mr. Sputowski...your
name has come to our attention”—I wonder how they got my name?
(CONTINUES READING) “Our agency is searching for highly skilled
craftsmen in the following trades:” (HANK MUMBLES AS HIS FINGER
TRACKS DOWN A LONG LIST UNTIL HE COMES TO WELDERS. HE
SHOUTS OUT.) Welders! They’re look’n for highly skilled welders! (HE
READS ON EXCITEDLY, MUMBLING TO HIMSELF.) They say if an applicant
qualifies they will place him immediately! D’ya hear that Cory! If I don’t
qualify nobody can! I’m gonna call now and make an appointment!
SCENE II
WE ARE IN THE OFFICE OF THE TECHNOLOGY REORIENTATION EMPLOYMENT AGENCY. AT CENTER STAGE IS A DESK WITH A TELEPHONE. SEATED BEHIND THE DESK IS MS. BLANK. IN FRONT OF THE DESK IS AN EMPTY CHAIR. STANDING BESIDE THE CHAIR, HOLDING SEVERAL, FILLED-OUT FORMS IS HANK SPUTOWSKI.THERE ARE TWO DOORS. ONE UPSTAGE LEFT AND THE OTHER UP-
STAGE RIGHT.
MS. BLANK IS A NO-NONSENSE EXECUTIVE. HER DARK HAIR IS PULLED BACK IN A TIGHT BUN. SHE WEARS NO MAKEUP. DARK GLASSES HIDE HER EYES. A BLACK, PINSTRIPE SUIT AND PLAIN, LOW-HEELED SHOES COMPLETE HER WARDROBE.
HANK (DRESSED IN HIS BEST SUIT) My name is Sputowski. I got your letter with
these here forms. (HOLDING FORMS OUT) They’re all filled out. I’m the best-
MS BLNK (CUTTING HIM OFF) Sit down Mr. Sputowski.
HANK (SEATS HIMSELF) Call me Hank.
MS BLNK Mr. Sputowski, you have been assigned to me. My name is Ms. Blank.
HANK Look, Miss—
MS BLNK (ICY) Ms!
HANK What?
MS BLNK My name is Ms not Miss!
HANK Oh.—look Mizz, I’m a welder. The best spot welder that was ever on an
assembly line. Your letter said—
MS BLNK (A FRIGID INTERRUPTION) My name is not miss or mizz. My name is Ms.
Blank. Please try to remember that, wont you?
HANK Yeah, sure. (HE EXTENDS HIS RIGHT HAND) Boy, am I glad to meetcha.
MS BLNK (IGNORING HANK’S HAND, SHE TAKES HIS FILLED OUT FORMS.) I see
that your first job was with United Motors Corporation.
HANK That’s right. I quit high school to go to work there. All my folks
worked at United. My father and his brothers, my grandfather and his
brothers. I mean I got uncles, cousins and nephews that worked there.
They all got laid off like me.
MS BLNK Why were you laid off Mr. Sputowski?
HANK (BITTER) You wanna know why I got laid off? Me, the best, goddamned—
excuse the language—spot welder they got on the assembly line! I’ll tell ya
why I got laid off after giv’n em the best twelve years of my life! After what
me and my family did for United—
MS BLNK (CUTTING HIM OFF) Why Mr. Sputowski?
HANK Why? Why—what?
MS BLNK Why were you laid off Mr. Sputowski?
HANK (MORE BITTER) I was replaced! D’ya wanna know who replaced me?
MS BLNK Suppose you tell me.
HANK I got replaced by a robot!
MS BLNK (STUDYING THE FORMS) Your next job was with Delta Truck Assemblies.
HANK Yeah. That’s right. I lucked out and got a job there right away on the
assembly line.
MS BLNK (LOOKING AT THE FORMS) After more than two years you were laid off
again.
HANK I was there almost three years when they laid me off. I couldn’ta believed it.
Me—the best spot welder they had! But—it happened again. They retooled
the factory and I got replaced by one of those goddamn robots.
MS BLNK (UNMOVED) I see. Your next and last job was with Allied Tractor.
HANK Yeah. I thought I was safe there. You know, it be’n a smaller company and
all that.
MS BLNK But you weren’t safe there, were you Mr. Sputowski?
HANK (SHAKING HIS HEAD) Nope. Not even there. A little over a year later they
canned me. I was replaced by another one of those freak’n robots. I’ll tell
you someth’n Mizz—Mizz—
MS BLNK Blank.
HANK Yeah. Mizz Blank. Them robots is tak’n away all the jobs from us human-
beans. Pretty soon there wont be any jobs left for somebody like me.
MS BLNK (FOR THE FIRST TIME THERE IS COMPASSION IN HER TONE.) Now, don’t
you worry about a thing Mr. Sputowski. This is no run-of-the-mill
employment agency. We guarantee that if an applicant qualifies, that
person will be put to work immediately.
HANK (NERVOUS) Do I qualify?
MS BLNK (SMILES FOR THE FIRST TIME) You certainly do Mr. Sputowski. A man with
your experience as a spot welder qualifies, without question. I believe we
can place you tomorrow.
HANK (OVERJOYED) Tomorrow? I—I don’t know what to say!
MS BLNK Don’t say anything. American Industry needs the best spot welders it can get
and we know where those needs are.
HANK (RENEWED SELF-CONFIDENCE) Well, you’re look’n at the best and I’m
ready to go to work!
MS BLNK Of course you are. But—before you do you have to go through our
reorientation program so that we can transform you into the new kind of
spot-welder that our modern factories require.
HANK Reorientation program? Look! I’m the best! I don’t need no reorientation
program.
MS BLNK Mr. Sputowski, with the competition American industry is receiving from
Japan and other countries, management has become very demanding. It is
really no more than a brief session. You go in and you come out. It only
takes one hour.
HANK That’s all, just one hour? When do I start?
MS BLNK Immediately. Just go through that door (POINTS STAGE RIGHT) over there
and you will be taken care of.
HANK (RISING FROM CHAIR. HE GRABS MS BLANK’S HAND.) Thank you for
everything! (HE TURNS AND WALKS TO DOOR AT STAGE RIGHT. AS HE
IS ABOUT TO ENTER HE TURNS TO Ms BLANK, SMILING.) See ya in one
hour.
SCENE III
IT IS ONE HOUR LATER. MS BLANK IS SEATED AT HER DESK LOOKING OVER VARIOUS PAPERS WHEN A BELL RINGS.
MS BLNK (LOOKING AT HER WATCH) Is it one hour already? (SHE RISES FROM
HER DESK AND GOES TO DOOR AT STAGE RIGHT. SLOWLY, SHE
OPENS THE DOOR.) Come in Mr. Sputowski.
HANK SPUTOWSKI SHUFFLES MECHANICALLY INTO THE ROOM. HE HAS, INDEED, BEEN TRANSFORMED. HANK IS A ROBOT.
MS BLANK, AFTER A BRIEF BUT PROFESSIONAL INSPECTION OF THE ROBOT RETURNS TO HER DESK. SHE PICKS UP THE TELEPHONE AND SPEAKS TO HER ASSISTANT.
MS BLNK Hello...Sally. Call United Motors and tell them that we can deliver the new
spot welding robot tomorrow. (PAUSE) Yes, the same price, $150,000
dollars. (SHE HANGS UP THE PHONE. RISING FROM HER DESK SHE GOES
TO DOOR AT STAGE LEFT AND OPENS IT. CORY SPUTOWSKI ENTERS.)
CORY SPUTOWSKI HAS ALSO BEEN TRANSFORMED. SHE IS SMARTLY DRESSED AND LOOKS YOUNG AND ATTRACTIVE. SHE SAUNTERS OVER TO THE ROBOT AND LOOKS AT IT WITH DETATCHED AMUSEMENT. STANDING BEHIND CORY IS MS BLANK. CORY TURNS TO FACE HER, SMILING.
MS BLNK (HOLDING CHECK OUT TO CORY) As agreed, here is your check for
$50,000.
BLACKOUT